Oh yeah, I forgot to mention how emotional I've been lately. I'm sure it's from the medications but I really feel bad for M sometimes. I think about horrible things like 'why would he choose to be with me?' and 'what if he doesn't love me anymore?'. I know that I'm only thinking those things because of stress and hormones but I hate it! I know how horrible it is for me and I know it's horrible for him too when I have those moments. It helps a lot to know that our love will get us through it all.
We actually sat down and had a talk about how emotional I've been lately and why. I explained to him that it was really hard not knowing anybody that has been in our situation as far as having to work to conceive. I've told a few people that we are trying and I think that, every time I tell somebody, I wish they will tell me that they had the same problems or that they know other people who have had to work at it too. I never get that. I have a lot of people tell us to stop trying or that it'll happen when the time is right. I know that the good intentions are there but it doesn't help. Other than the comments that people make that they don't even know are hurtful, everybody is very supportive and excited for us. M hasn't really told anybody. I don't know why but part of me thinks that it's because he doesn't want to get their hopes up and have it not end up happening. Anyway, we talked and I realize now that he does really feel alone in this too. It isn't quite the same because it isn't his body that is failing us but he at least kind of understands how I feel.
I wish I could find some kind of infertility support group in my area. It would help loads to have somebody to talk to that understands.
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