New Years is probably the only time of the year when I look at my life and think things like 'that really sucked' or 'most amazing time ever!'. The entire year and all of the holidays that we celebrate make us look back on times in our lives that we wouldn't normally.
- Valentines day reminds us of old lovers and how horrible past relationships were.
- St Patrick's Day makes us think about alcohol related activities and fun we may have had with friends, family and even people that we don't like so much anymore.
- Easter makes me think about childhood and the ways that I will celebrate with my little ones some day. It also makes me think about my future; how many children I will have, if I'll be a good mother.
- Summer time isn't a holiday but it always makes me think of childhood memories like running through the sprinklers or playing night games with friends.
- Halloween makes me think of the stories of all of the fictional and non-fictional characters adults and children dress like. It makes me think about their stories and also all of the past Halloween celebrations that I have taken place in.
- Thanksgiving, even though only celebrated here in the US, makes me think of all of the things that I am thankful for. It is also a powerful reminder to be tolerant and understand the history of things the way that they actually happened instead of just making up some happy story. It's a reminder that we have so much to be thankful for because of the sacrifices and hard times.
- Christmas is a time of love and family. I'm not a religious person but there are so many aspects of the holiday that make me happy and thoughtful. Christmas should be a reminder that you should treat people well and give back ALL times throughout the year.
I feel the two of them should be mentioned separately because they make me think of different things. New Year's Eve makes me think about the last year while New Year's Day makes me think about the next year and my hopes for it.
- New Year's Eve, tonight, I think about all of the things in my life that have changed and how those things have affected me. At the beginning of the year, M and I lived with his Father and step-mother after some very unfortunate circumstances involving other family. Although the circumstances made me feel weak and like I didn't have control, so many good things came out of the situation. I got to know my father-in-law and his wife better and I learned that they are some of the most amazing, loving people that I know.
In May, we moved into our own place. It's small but it's alright for now. The rent is really cheap and it's a home. When we first moved in, we had a problem with spiders. We hired somebody to come spray the house and then we had a problem with earwigs. After 4 times of them coming to spray, we have not seen a bug in months. We haven't been able to save up money like we thought we would but we have been able to afford to live mostly-comfortable while living here because of the price. M also started his new job in May. He's been there ever since and, even though the pay isn't wonderful, the insurance has been pretty good.
In September, after what felt like a very long time of trying, we found out that we are pregnant. We were, and still are, ecstatic. I never really wanted children before but, as soon as M and I met, I knew that I wanted to have a family with him. He is the most amazing thing to me and I am so happy to be taking this journey with him.
- New Year's Day, as sad as it may seem, makes me think of more negative things from the past year and what I can do to change them. I'm not a 'New Year's Resolution' maker; I'm more of a goal maker because goals can be small or large.
Most of the time, I'll think for a second or two on this day about losing weight but this year, it's the opposite. Not necessarily gaining weight but being healthy for the pregnancy. I've lost about 40 pounds since conceiving and, although it may be okay, I think that if I keep losing, it may become an issue so I will need to focus on eating more. Not more food, just more often to keep my metabolism going. I also think that I should be paying attention to WHAT I eat even more than I do now. I rarely eat meat and don't eat fast food very often but I think it's time to cut the meat completely out and, if I have to eat out, get something healthy instead of letting myself indulge.
We are in our own place now but it isn't big enough to have a baby! Not only that, it isn't big enough for my Boxer, Zelda, either and she is the second born (the cat was first). The biggest, toughest thing that I want for the New Year is a new home. I want something with a yard so Zelda can go outside when she needs to or even when she just wants to play. I also have to admit that a large back yard would be amazing because there's nothing like sitting out on a summer day reading a good book (under an umbrella, of course). We really wanted to buy a place but M has just a few more things to do to bring his credit up to par so it isn't a possibility for us yet.
The most important thing about the New Year to me is just having our happy, healthy baby boy. The idea of delivering is horrifying but I have a lot more research to do on that as well. I know that he will change our lives forever and it is a change that M and I welcome and look forward to.
I think most of the things for next year come down to preparing for the baby. We need to collect things, I want to have a nursery ready for him and have all of the supplies that we need so, when we come home, we can all have time as a family and bond.
Sorry for the very long post. I could write more and more but I won't. Some things can stay in my head. :)
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